My Dirty Little Secret

Okay, here it is - I'M A BAD HOUSEWIFE.

Yep. I'm coming clean! (Ironic, isn't it?) I think I'm a decent mom, a stay-at-home-mom doing all the things I think I should be doing for my kids. But unfortunately along with the stay-at-home-mom title also comes the job description of "housewife." You know, person that tends to the house? That is the part I'm not so good on. And you want to know why? There is a side to me that is lazy and procrastinates!

All my life I've been an overachiever. I like to go and do, you know? But I don't apply myself to my house the way I do other things in my life. That being said, once the first set of twins were born, I was largely confined to the home and just keeping my head above water. There was NO tending the house because it just wasn't even possible. I didn't have time to do a little thing here or there, so you know what? I got used to taking 5-10 minute breaks on the computer. Checking Facebook. Emailing. Then blogging. And let's not forget loading and editing pictures (at least that one is productive). But what I also found was that when on the computer, the kids actually left me alone. Out of sight, out of mind (meaning I was out of THEIR minds). My 5 minute breaks frequently turned into 30. But I never felt bad because I knew if I started something I would surely be interrupted. Especially if it involved me making an appearance in other areas throughout the house.

So a habit formed. A time-wasting habit that served a good purpose but I have since outgrown it in need, but the habit has remained. I need to break it. I need to be more productive. I will readily admit that the days all kids are in school I do NOT waste time. But I do take a lot of fun, personal time on those days and I am rarely at home tidying up the house. I squeeze in ME time around all my other errands and things that have to be done. And I'm very happy about that. After many years of having virtually no me time, I feel I'm entitled. It's like making up for lost time.

But on the other days, I get sucked into the computer. But the kids allow me plenty of time to get more done, and yet I haven't managed to be disciplined about being more productive. There are so many things I could pick up, organize, take care of, and yet I'm once again sucked in.

Make me a room mom, a girl scout leader, or a Sunday school teacher and I'll come through for you. But taking care of something on my to do list is an entirely different story.

Time to break the habit, but now we enter into summer. Something tells me it's not going to be just yet. But I know that if I have the luxury of staying home, and if things are getting easier with the kids (though activity wise we are getting SO much busier), then I've got to start finding a way to make myself better at keeping our lives in order. I try. We're not a total disaster around here. Honestly we're probably middle of the road. But if I'm not making excuses then I know I could do a much better job. Self-discipline can be a hard thing!