We've Really Turned the Corner

So school has been back in session for two weeks now. I always find it interesting that some moms are in tears this time of year, sending their precious babies off to the care of someone else. Okay, I love my kids but no need for tears people. They're coming back in just a few hours. I am one of the yoo hoo moms. I love my kids as much as anybody, but my two sets of twins have taken a major toll on me over the years and I just crave having a bit of time to myself. Last year the little girls started preschool and I felt like a bird out of a cage. I don't mean that to be insulting to my kids. I adore my kids but I need some time for myself too. Some balance.

So last year, even with the little girls in school, school itself took a toll on me too. The hours to myself were wonderful, but for some reason with 4 in school, often 4 lunches to make, 4 folders to keep up with, homework every night, waking up early, etc just exhausted me to no end (remember my whole immune system last year and my bout with Fifth Disease). And then my toddlers decided that the week school started was the week to start the transition out of cribs. So you get what I'm saying. I was tired.

I actually looked forward to summer. And you know what? We had a nice summer. And I slept. The little girls are finally potty trained. We can get babysitters with no problem. It seems like all major twin hurdles are behind us. We found plenty of ways to pass the time. The kids can play in the house and I often have free time even when they're here. It's not uninterrupted time and the house looks like a tornado went through it, but overall it was quite nice in a way.

I had hardly any time to myself this summer. It wasn't until the last few weeks I had a couple days where I could go off on my own for a few hours. And it gave me a taste of what was around the corner. So yeah, I was looking forward to school starting, but not in the way I had in years past. It's a trade-off, whereas in the past it's been a huge score for mom! So I guess if that's the way I was feeling, then maybe, just maybe, that's proof that things are getting better. More manageable. More balanced. Yes.

And you know, I LOVE having kids in preschool. I know I'll be a bit sad when the last ones go off to kindergarten. I'm going to have to reinvent myself a bit (something that comes more and more to mind lately). But preschool is great. Not too early. Not every day. Just enough. It's just right. And so cute too. I remember last year, after being away from the school for a year, walking back through the doors and being filled with warmth as I saw all the little children lined up in the halls, like deer in headlights, with each animal name on the doors of each class. Ashley and Reagan were in the Puppies class last year. It makes my heart smile. Except for the screaming as the parents try to leave. Not a fan of that. Especially when they're mine. But you know what I mean. Sorry I'm rambling.

I think I'm in a good phase right now.

(Above: Mackenzie and Kaitlyn in 2008)