Investing in Your Kids

It's no secret that when we raise a child we invest sometimes our entire livelihood into them. But I'm not talking about anything having to do with money. I'm talking about the time and effort we sometimes put into them, because we love them.

It seems like I have put a lot of EXTRA effort into things this summer.  On the one hand I kind of feel like I have to, but I imagine some parents just don't bother.  What things am I talking about?

Well, I started thinking about all this last night. Mackenzie wanted to go out to ride her bike.  She and Kaitlyn just turned 7 and STILL need training wheels. Mike has taken them so many times, to no avail. He would ultimately get frustrated and mad and they would ultimately want to quit and come home crying.

So last night I finally took her.  You know what?  It was tiring. I got a few ant bites. It was hot and humid (actually it felt great til I'd ran with her about 10 times - then I realized my clothes were sticking to me). My heart was pounding from running along beside her so many times. I absolutely wanted to go back home. But she's 7 and needs to learn this.

So I perservered. I made HER persevere because I had the inkling it was working. And you know what? She did it! Probably 4 times I let go while she continued to pedal about 10-15 feet.  Does this mean I'm trying to say that I have some magic touch? No. All this means is that years of trying is finally paying off.  But YEARS people!  It's exhausting. But what are we going to do? Not teach them to ride a bike?  For those whose kids picked it up quickly, consider yourselves lucky.

What else?  How about swimming?

Again, some pick it up quickly. I'd say that most do not. Whether you teach them yourself or pay for lessons, we have invested so much time (and money) into getting this down. This has been the first summer I really haven't had to worry about all 4 kids at the pool. It's been so much more relaxed knowing that the big girls are really fine in the water. (I still know what they're doing and keep an eye on them, but you know what I mean.)

So while the big girls were at swim team every day, I realized the little girls needed to learn to swim. Since they were cooperating for me and since I am free (as in don't cost anything), I knew that I needed to get off the lawn chair near the baby pool, take them into the shallow end, and teach. Many days I didn't want to fool with it. But I did because they were ready and receptive so it was time. They are doing amazing for their age! I feel like they are so much further along than the big girls were at this stage. Both of them can take a breath and keep going.  HUGE accomplishment. When summer started they couldn't even put their faces in the water.  Again, they wouldn't have just learned this on their own.  Day after day of working with them.

A few more things that require major commitment and investment:

Potty training.  Ugh. Need I say more?  Eventually you HAVE to take the diapers away and deal with the mess. Eventually you have to start asking them every 30 minutes to go potty.  This summer we started off potty training the last of the 4.  Done.  Again, thankful - some kids take years to get it (been there done that!).  Now one child is working on getting out of pullups at night.  It's a pain. When I'm so tired I can no longer stay awake, I get up and go wake her one last time to go pee.  And some days (like today) I have a mess to clean up. But I'm pretty sure if I don't do this she's going to go to junior high in a pullup at night.  The little girls are next on the night time. Sigh. It gets old. But it's necessary.

Reading.  I think with all these things, some kids will pick things up naturally and parents who've never had a child struggle in these areas should feel very very lucky.  But for the rest of us, we have to persevere when neither the child nor ourselves really feel like it.  Mackenzie enjoyed reading and picked it up pretty quickly. We still had to help her but she "got" it.  Kaitlyn was a different story. First, because sister had such an easy time, she backed off even more. Plus she had no interest. She wouldn't sit with me and practice reading. And I cannot even tell you how SLOWLY she read at first.  The simplest of books would often take 30 minutes. I wanted to claw my eyes out sometimes. But I would just sit, bite my lip, and offer encouragement to keep going.  In first grade her reading made significant strides. She is now reading small chapter books. I'm very proud of her, but if I hadn't worked with her at home....

Then there's teaching them faith and morals. That's a whole other ball of wax. Lifelong commitment to teaching the gospel. Taking them to church every week, no matter how challenging, so they can learn, gain a testimony, and build habits for life, so they can one day go back to our Lord, is worth doing.

So you get my point.  We invest in our kids.  Sometimes it feels like we are going above and beyond what is necessary. After all, isn't feeding them, bathing them, carting them to and fro, and entertaining them enough?  No.  We are committed as parents to their joys, well-being, and triumphs.  And there is great satisfaction when we reach each of these milestones.